Love Love Love

I love my wife, my kiddo, our dog, and most of all...MY LIFE! I couldn't ask for anything more than what I already have. I get to spend time with those that love me, while doing the things that I love!!!

1.30.2009

DID THAT JUST HAPPEN?!?!

Wow. After two and ahalf years....I have it in writing. My boyfriend loves me. I knew it. We always can tell, but its definitely more than nice to hear it. Granted, its in a text. Its nothing eloquently written, just a simple, "Luv u too." But you don't know how much it means to me. All it took was me being a little unselfish. Instead of my normal temper tantrum when he told me he was going to be coming home late on a Friday night, I told him, "Ok. Be careful. Love you." He wrote back, "Luv u too." Normally, I would have gotten nothing. Not a response. Not anything. WooWoo!

Maybe you think I'm silly. But this is imprtant in my relationship.

1.29.2009

Thursdays mean

Dance class for Lorelli. She was soooo excited yesterday that TODAY is dance class. She packed her dance clothes in her suitcase all herself to go to her daddy's. She called her tia and told her she had dance on Thursday. And that she has dance shoes and dance tights. Here is a pic of her from her first dance class.
And, since I have not posted that many of her lately, I thought I would inundate you with pictures of my crazy baby.

This is my baby at my work eating my spinach calzone.

This is at home with us the day after I got my hair colored.

In the boondocks visiting my Grandpa for Christmas.

And these are my two nephews: Hunter and Christopher.

She went to the dentist with Miss Patricia and this was what they gave her. I call them her UGLY TEETH!

Very serious discussion with her daddy....

And a REALLY BIG SOMBRERO!!!!!

1.27.2009

Photo Tag

My Toby has challenged all her friends and readers to do a photo game. Every month you post a picture from your photo folders. January, you post the 1st picture in your 1st folder. February, you post the 2nd pic in your 2nd folder and so on. Here is my picture. Its my Christmas tree that Lorelli and Rob and I decorated. White fake tree with blue and silver and white ornaments.

1.25.2009

Friends for the Seasons

So...you know the saying that we have different frends in our life for different reasons...I totally believe that phrase. The dfferent things I have been through in my life have proven this adage to be quite true.

I have Toby who I have practically grown up with. She knows me and accepts me, no matter how much I have shocked her in our years as friends. And I am sure there are things that I have done and said that have shocked her pants off, at times. She keeps me grounded. She's like my sister, one that I actually like, the one you would get under the covers and whisper your secrets and your fears to. And I thank God every day for her.

I have Benjamin. He has been there for me since the day that we met. Granted all of our times have not been good. There has been heartache. There has been laughter. There has been love. And there has been hate. But he understands me on a level that even I don't understand. He gets me in some crazy way that only an ex could. He brought me out of the shy, scared shell that I was in. I call him when I want to be stupid or funny or to complain about my family. He gets that and accepts it.

I have Nini. Wow how do I explain her? She is the friend that I never would have expected her to be. If you had told me that we would be close I would have laughed at you. But I love her, still. I call her and tell her my yucky stuff. And I tell her the things I think about during the day. She has the cutest little baby and I love him, too. She has been there to listen to me whine and complain and has been there with me through heartbreak on both our sides. She has helped build me up and make sure I stay there.

Sammy and Lety....they have to be groupd together. The three of us together are The Three Musketeers. We are funny, goofy, oftentimes drunk....but we are there for each other when we need to be. We have enough dirt on each other that its better to stay friends than to not!!! Just kidding...sorta. They are the first person I tell when I am interested in someone. They are the ones I turn to when I have done something naughty. They are the ones guaranteed to put a smile on ur face. athe ones that will take u out fo a drunken night of dancing and mayhem. They are the ones that, if u ever needed it, they would kick some ass for you!!

A.D. has to make this list. He, being Lorelli's dad, also has a special place in my heart. He gave me my daughter. He always has an answer when I ask, "What are u thinking?" He makes me believe that I am sexy and beautiful. I don't question myself when I am around him. He broke my heart by not being the passionate, doting, honest man that I deserved. But he opened my heart back up when I didn't think that I would be loved by anyone again.

Bia. She is a unique friend. She held me up. She made me stay true to myself. She gets me in a way no other person ever has. She sees into my soul. She knows my heart. I don't have words to describe the place that she has in my heart. I don't know how I would have made it without her when my grandmother was ailing. You could call her my saving grace. She would say that she was none of those things and that al she did was listen. She is utterly humble, gorgeous, giving, and loving. I love her so much. And I am very lucky to have someone who gets me without me ever saying a word.

And my Rob. He brings out the funny in me. We laugh. A lot. As I posted before about him he is awesome. He loves me. He takes care of me. I love him, too. He holds my hand even wen he doesn't want to. He puts up with my overly affectionate self. He handles crazy PMS me with finesse. I couldn't ask for much more right now.

I thank HIM for all the wonderful ppl in my life. I have so many good friends that I am grateful for. There are so many more than the few that I have named here.

1.24.2009

I'm going ......

To the Honda Battle of the Bands. I have been wanting to go for the whole four years I have lived here. I am finally going. I have to spend the day with A.D., but it is a small price to pay to go watch bad @$$ marching bands perform and do their thing. Just thought I would share that with all of you. As much as marching band sucked while we were in it....I gotta admit I miss the fun and the shows!!!

1.22.2009

Made me melt

My little one is amazing. She can take the worst day I have had in a long time and then turn my "frown upside down." Yesterday she decided she wanted to stay the night at her daddy's house after we bought her dance clothes. At first it started as a trip over there to show him what his money had bought. Then she decided she was staying the night. OKAY!!! Yay, a night furing the week for just me and Rob...AWESOME!!!! She was so cute. When I got ready to leave, though, she changed her mind and started falling to pieces. She told me, "If you leave I will miss you and I will cry. I want to go home with you!!!!!"

Isn't that just awesome!!!!!

1.21.2009

Dance Class

I am enrolling Lorelli in dance classes. She starts tomorrow. I am so excited. She is ecstatic. We stopped by the dance studio on Monday and procured all the information about the classes and the fee schedules. We are going tonight to purchase her dance uniform: leotard, shoes, and tights. The instructors at the dance school have all been dancing since their early childhood years. They have 30+ years of instruction. Some of their students proceed on to receive scholarships and dance in college and in professional dancing companies. I know that is looking way ahead into the future, but if we are going to pay money to teach Lorelli how to do something then I want it to be worth A.D.'s money (since he is the one paying, I am just the one spending). She will be in a pre-ballet class that is specifically for 3 and 4 year old children. It will focus on teaching them counting and basic steps as far as I can tell. Any which way, that is where we are going with Lorelli.

OH YEAH...she is also getting enrolled in cooking classes with Young Chef's Academy. This is the same school that the older twins from Jon & Kate Plus 8 attend. She will be starting that in February. We are going there on Saturday to enroll her and look around and speak to THOSE instructors. It is a little bit expensive, but I think it will be so worth it. They have a Kindercooks class for 3 and 4 year olds that Lorelli will be involved in.

She is going to be one busy little bee.

1.20.2009

Epochal

There are several words that are synonymous with MOMENTOUS. According to www.thesaurus.com those words are as follows : big, chips are down, consequential, considerable, critical, crucial, decisive, earth-shaking, earth-shattering, epochal, eventful, far-reaching, fateful, grave, heavy, heavy number, historic, material, meaningful, memorable, notable, of moment, outstanding, pivotal, significant, substantial, vital, weighty. Unfortunately, none of those words are really up to par with what today will be. Historic. Monumental. Renowned. I like EPOCHAL. It sounds big and strong and secure. While I may not have voted for Obama because I do not agree with all that he stands for, I will support him as our 44th President of the United States. I will stand behind him as he guides our country through this tumultous era. He is beginning his journey at one of the most turbulent times in our nation's history. I wish him the best of luck and the strength of America. I do not expect things to change overnight. I do not expect them to turn around completely within his first term. But I do expect change. I do expect him to hold up to his campaign promises. I expect him to change our view of politicians. And most of all, I expect him to be true and sincere.

1.17.2009

OH MY GOODNESS!!!

I found the most awesomest hilarious funny coolest blog and I have been reading it all morning. I want to be this chicks best friend. I want to have long animated witty conversations with her. I want to eat her food. That she makes. In the kitchen...come on people...get your heads out of the gutter. She is hilarious. And so descriptive. And witty. And sarcastic. You have to go read her stuff. It is sort of a food blog...but not really...but it is. She is pure genius, I think.

http://thespitefulchef.blogspot.com

He REALLY likes me

I just anted to let all of you avid readers know that my boyfrend invited me to Hooters two weeks in a row.

Ok....that's not entirely true. I DID go two weeks in a row. Last week I kind of invited myself. Several days in advance. I asked if I could come along and have a drink, too. I was granted permission. Last night he just took me.

Just wanted to share his accolades!

1.15.2009

Irritable

Sometimes I get irritable fo no reason. And other tims I get irritable because I am emotionlly overloaded. And then other tmes its all hormones. And then other times I have substantial reason to get irritated. But mostly, with me, its because I get emotionally overloaded and I don't know how else to deal with my emotions properly. I know, you're supposed to learn ho to compartmentalize and all that when you're younger, but I suck at it. So this week....on top of having a bit of an emotional overload...I am sick. And if you know me then you know I am a whiny butt when I am sick. I rearrranged my whole living room the other night because I wanted to lay on Robs lap and go to sleep while he was playing his game. Now...back to me being irritable...My poor baby caught the brunt of it the other night. She was whiny and I was sick and whiny and those two do not mesh well together at all. But, I tried to keep my cool and keep saying over to myself over and over "its not her fault - you're just sick and irritable." Thankfully bedtime came, albeit a little earlier tha normal for her, and I was done.

As for the emotional overoad part...I had a long conversation with an "ex" of mine. It started because I had a dream about them and then I dreamed about telling them I had dreamt of them. It was all very intense in my mind. From there ensued a very deep ACTUAL conversation about how we missed each other's conversation and friendship. I said how important they had been in my life at the time even though they were still in love with their ex. There was a lot of soul baring and heart sharing, if that makes sene. Things we had not been able to say to each other when the emotions ran so deep were finally able to be verbalized. It felt nice to get it out in the open. no longer feel as if I am keeping that part of my life bottled up to look at later. I finally asked what I had meant in their life...to which I got the response "its hard to say." After a brief explnation of sorts I ased the question that had been buring in my heart and mind and soul fr more than 2 years..."Did you love me?" To which I got a very adamant, "Yes." I now feel as if we can get past this and find our way back to friendship once more. This person was once a huge part of my life. The one who held me and comforted me when my grandmother was soooo sick. This person became a close friend, then a coser friend, then somehow a person I loved. Someone who forced me to look at myself through other's eyes and see how strong I was and what a beautiful (inside and out) woman I could be. I am eternally grateful for that and I hopethat we can move forward and find our way back to friendship.

Now, you may be wondering about my current relationship since I just took 5 years to describe a past relationship. But do not worry...my current relationship is very strong. I am very happy. And for that matter, I am happy just BEING HAPPY. Rob treats me well. He is a wonderful guy. He has thus far shown himself NOT to be a cheater, which is important in my world and has not been a strong point of the other men in my life. Yes I get irritated...but I still am educating him in the ways of affection. He is slowly but surey catching on. Very slowly. An I do not understand the need to go out every Friay and drink and be loud and stuff with THE BOYS...but maybe that is not for me to understand and it is only for me to accept. So, I am slowly but surely accepting it. Very slowly. :) But despite that, or maybe because of it....we are learning to be a strong couple. Now, do want to get married? No. Do I want to have babies? No. But do I want to go somewhere else? NO! Like I said, I am happy....and that makes me happy.